The Journal of maccron.
rant 05-22-10 18:47
I feel highly irritable and I can't understand why... nothing bad has happened. Life is pretty decent right now, not great but not bad. I've had some great times with family and friends lately, some really good times, but for some reason today I'm really sour. It's like that line in fight club. "I wanted to break something beautiful." Where's Jared Leto when you need him...

/rant
12-14-09 11:43
some say the end is near. some say we'll see armageddon soon. certainly hope we will. i sure could use a vacation from this bullshit three ring circus...
so any redditors on elowel?
rant 07-21-09 18:29
I'm so stressed out over work right now. I hate these stupid near impossible deadlines that I somehow have to miraculously pull off... There is no money to hire a decent crew so I have to manage completing the task with the help of only two others. It also happens to reach 115 degrees outside which makes everything even more unpleasant... fuck business politics...

I've been shoveling shit for almost 4 years now... the paycheck would be nice.

One day at a time...
best fortune cookie ever! 07-19-09 13:35
A friend is someone who knows the song of your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words...
am i doing it right? 06-27-09 01:54
my best friend is in a horrible relationship right now... he's 22 and has been with her for over 2 years. she's 28 and has two kids, an 11 year old and a 4 year old. she's by no means good looking and as far as i can tell, doesn't give a damn about bettering herself. she is the epitome of white trash, at least through my eyes...

my friend is quite the opposite. he is extremely hard working and everything about him screams success. he is over analytical and has a complete engineer outlook on everything he does. we work together and it amazes me how he can analyze anything from every circumstance and yet not see what we (his family and friends) see about his relationship with her.

i used to live in the same house with them. i had a mini apartment that was attached to the house which was my safe haven because they would constantly argue over every little thing she could come up with. it was ridiculous and got so bad that i finally blew up at them. i was pissed at them for always fighting and just let it all out. it helped the situation for a while. they stopped fighting so much but after that, instead of fighting with my buddy in front of me, she would wait until they were behind locked doors to start. and it was all just over stupid shit...

you know how when your walking around a walmart, and you see that woman yanking her kids around, and screaming at them, and smacking them, and just downright being a negligent mother? yeah, thats her. it was so irritating hearing her constantly scream at her children and tell them how sick she is of them. her children aren't angels, and its obvious that they dont respect her. she doesnt know how to treat people. everyone has told him that shes not good for him. i have yet to find one person that thinks shes interesting, or genuine, or a good person for that matter. apparently everyone sees this but him...

well anyways, i couldnt take it anymore. she finally ticked me off enough that i had to leave. i packed up all my shit, flicked her off and left. it was something that could of been resolved, but i doubt anything would have changed. it hurt my friend that i would rather leave than resolve the issue.

as i mentioned earlier, my friend and i work together. we sat down (without her) a couple of days after that incident about 2 months ago, and talked about our point of views. i told him how i think that he needs to reevaluate his relationship with her because from what i can see, it brings him nothing but headaches and that she hasnt changed and will not change for the better. he told me that she has changed and that im choosing not to see any of those changes. we agreed that we would each try to see his situation from each others perspective. i still cant see any positives but he and i have pretty much ignored the incident and continued working together. we're not 100% because i have refused to talk to her since then. theres nothing she could say that would make me forgive her. she would have to completely change, like she has been saying she would, for me to start talking to her.

the worst part of all of this is that i think its hurting my friend. i use to be a dampener in their relationship and now that im not around, its waring him out. at least thats how it feels to me when we talk. im not sure but i think hes becoming an alcoholic. hes finding other ways to numb himself...

im catching a lot of flak from his mother as well. she is irritated that i refuse to make nice with his girl because its hurting my friend but ive played along with them too long. theres nothing nice i have to say to her so i would rather not say anything at all. thats where my problem comes into play. im fucking tired of dealing with her manipulative bullshit so id rather keep my sanity and not have to deal with her, but do i let my friend deteriorate? am i being a dick for not wanting to deal with this? what would you guys do?
3:54am 06-18-09 02:21
Elliot Smith was an amazing artist. I should be asleep but instead I'm listening to his music. He was so talented. Its a shame we had to lose him...
hangovers suck... 06-07-09 07:29
So last night was my ex's wedding. I went and survived without any incidents. Well I did get a beer spilled on me but that was nothing. I can't really say it'll be any sort of closure for me. I still love that girl. She's an amazing person and I wish her the best.
Authority Zero! 04-03-09 23:38
man that was a great show! front row moshin it up! jason jumped into the crowd on top of my friend and i. great fucking show! im fucking exhausted and have no voice... its a great night!
sweetness! 03-30-09 18:31
just drove back my car from el paso. its a '79 datsun 280zx. looks like shit but it runs pretty damn good! just gotta fix some minor issues but it feels good to be back in my datsun.
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